Blah....

Yesterday was a good day but a bad one too. Today was good but it wasn't very exciting I've felt like crap all day. Yesterday we had to travel all the way to Abilene, but luckily we got to spend a luxurious ride on a charter bus, and we watched Remember the Titans on the way there. And we won our game 1-0, that was the good part of the day.

The bad part was that my history teacher made me cry, in front of the whole class, I was so embarassed and sad. Yeah I normally do all of my work and make really good grades well this week in his class has just sucked, cause I feel really stupid to try and ask him anything cause he just shuts me down. Well yeah my mind this week has been out in space, and I've had a billion different thoughts running rapantly through my head (and its only wednesday), and especially the thing with my mom. And well he gave us these 5 questions on friday and well they weren't questions it just said to answer in detail, and then he gave us 10 questions monday, and were really hard questions (hardest ones the whole tri), and my mind has just been one big blur, and I really did try, repeated, to do it and I would read it and read it and it was like my mind wasn't comprehending what it was doing. and then after awhile without even realizing it I would just be staring at my book, and when I realized it I would get really pissed off. Having my mind off in never neverland and really trying to do my work and not being able to concentrate really frustrates me and I get upset (if ya don't believe me ask Miranda shes seen me like this but with geometry), and then having that attention brought up to the whole class. See I've just tried to appear lazy, which I hate, but seriously when I get frustrated and I just can't figure out answers I get really really upset, and it makes me feel dumb. So yeah he drew the attention to other people in the class that had written 3 words for their answer and compared them to a kid's (who normally doesn't do anything) paper who answered in detail. Then he was like and lets see or you could just not do any of it or just answer one question like Erin did. And that really pissed me off, and yeah I wanted to just tell him off so bad but I couldn't tell him the real reason cause he is just cold-hearted, but I started to say something and then yeah he kept saying things that I was lazy, blah, blah, blah. It really upset me cause he just doesn't understand and the other people in my class know that and told him so and he was just like whatever and shut her down. But yeah needless to say I started crying and didn't stop till the class was almost over it was like 15 minutes or so.

Well then we were leaving at 1:00 and I have B lunch so I get out at 12:48, well I was still upset and went to find Miranda (shes in A lunch then is in class when I have lunch) to get some lunch money, and then she just held me and told me it would be ok, so I felt a little better. Well I still thought I had plenty of time, but then I realized I had like 5 minutes. So I ran in and got my soccer bag and left and went and but all my crap on the bus, then ran inside and got some food, then ran back to the bus, then figured I'd better go to the bathroom so I did and still had a little time left (hurrying for nothing really sucks). Well then I get really calm till we get to Abilene and I start to get dressed. I started freaking then everyone asked what was wrong. I had left my cleats, shin-gaurds, and my ankle-gaurds. Then several of the girls let me borrow their extra stuff, so then everything was ok again. But I had to ride home in the backseat of Bee's truck, well half the seat, and trust me for 3 hours like that, it feels like being stuck in a box.

Anyways, sorry I have to vent my feelings sometimes, if I don't I go crazy, lol. But yeah thats just my rant for the week.