**Thoughts on Friendships**
We all have friends. We all have different types of friends. But is there anything particular that characterizes the degree of friendship you have with another? Now I'm talking about specifics here, and naturally they'd vary from person to person. Of course we all probably have a different classifications of friends.
Perhaps there are certain signs that are clear indications of how good of friends you are with another, and not just some sort of thing that "naturally" comes about. But rather, it's something that you do yourself to promote the friendship, to embrace a once loose bond and raise it to a higher degree. Let me explain. I'm not really sure how many degrees of friendships I consider myself, but if I were to pick a number, I'd probably lean toward five.
First, I suppose I'd have to describe peers and acquaintances. These are the people who I'll talk to in school, especially in classes, around the lockers, between periods, clubs - all that fun stuff. And perhaps I'll also talk to them online once we're out of school, in the case that I'm actually online. We have some nice conversations now and then, but it's nothing to make me wipe a tear or anything. Nice friends, these people be.
At an early stage, there's some sort of hand-greeting. Sometimes, it's a handshake, but usually it's a high-five, since the former tends to be used with the more meaningful-friends (that's not to say high-fivers aren't significant, though).
I suppose next on the line would be the phone call. If I'm willing to spend more than a casual minute or two in conversation with a person outside of school (and not necessarily on a regular basis...just in general), then it's usually an indication that I prefer them over acquaintances and those who are merely high-fivers. And that's not to imply that someone who I don't call isn't a good friend; it just means I'm probably not as close as I am with the following types of friends.
In considering the friendships I have, I'd have to say if I'm even better friends with a person who I talk to on the phone, once we come up with a nickname, that's usually an indication of an even better friendship (in relation to how I think of it). Usually this falls hand-in-hand with the previously mentioned degree, but not always. Nicknames, silliness, absurd conversations...fun times.
Now we're getting into more of the higher degrees which I couldn't really describe. I know at the end there are those all-wonderful friendships in which I'm willing to share very personal information, but I can't figure out if there's anything before that. I guess I could consider "late night" conversations as a characteristic of a level, but really those are just more significant phone conversations that lead into this "last" level. So let's just say that's the last level.
So, uh, yeah I guess that's sort of it. Five levels, woo hoo.
Now if you read this, please don't be offended. I'm simply trying to figure myself out, as always. And I'd like to make a general point across that people don't just go up a ladder, first attaining all the characteristics of the previous degrees. I'd have to say plenty of people skip, as well as start off in different places. That's just sort of how our lives are, though, you know? We're not all born rich, we're not all born poor.
Oh, and there are plenty of exceptions to the rule. So don't think I'm trying to be restrictive. Eh, so what kinda' friend do you think you are to me? Or a more worthwhile question: what are the things you do with friends with which you have different levels of friendship?
Food for thought. Whatever that means. Lol well actually I do know what that means.
~~Life in the Fast Lane, or so it seems~~
Ever get that feeling that life is passing you by, and yet you can easily go ahead with the flow of things, but something just doesn't seem right. You want to stepforward, but something's keeping you from doing so...something's holding you back, and you don't feel comfortable continuing on until everything is settled first. Most people just tend to go with the flow, and in the process never really learn to live life to its fullest. I mean what happened to stopping and smelling the roses. If you just go through life easily, do you really have a true experience of it. Perhaps thats why its difficult to move on sometimes, cause they're afraid of moving on cause they might miss a single moment of something. I believe life is like a rollercoaster, only they are two different rides. One is completely fast and its over almost as soon as it began. But the other, goes fast and then goes on to a hill, and it has to push and pull its way up to the top-and its a longer process, and then there are more faster moments and then you hit another slow spot. Whats the fun of a ride that stops almost as soon as it began.
If you run through life without even looking around once in awhile, it'll be over before you know it, and then have regrets that you didn't do very much with your life. So take the second rollercoaster, it may go fast for awhile in life, but just stop and really live, let go, do something and put all of your heart into it, really enjoy the moment. And not to sound cheesy or anything, but live every moment like its your last, cause well you never know when your ride will be over. A zen value: put a 100% of yourself into whatever you do, whether it be walking, watering flowers, kicking a ball around, or even simply breathing. Every moment is precious, cherish them.
Wow this entry seems to be really inspiring huh? Its been awhile. Laters
Sunday, January 25, 2004
~~Damn Temptation~~
No i'm not saying i've given into it. But temptation is everywhere. I hate it so much. I love Sara with all of my heart, but shes half the country away. I want to stay true to her, i truly believe i could spend the rest of my life with her. But all i can do right now is talk to her on the phone, i can't hold her or kiss her or any of that. And just to be honest i'm a very intimate person. I like to hold hands, kiss, hold the person, and all that stuff. And to have it once and not have it again, well it drives me crazy. I told her i didn't want to date anyone else but her, which is true, but dammit i'm so lonely down here in Texas. I need someone to keep me company. But see i have a self-resistance from giving into these temptations. Plus well you can't give into tempation when you don't even have the opportunity to. What is it that people say, you can look but you can't touch. The people I would like to atleast go on date with, most likely wouldn't even give me the light of day, nothing more than friends.
I feel like i'm stuck in the middle. Its so frustrating. I do i feel like i'm betraying Sara by thinking all of this or feeling it. Cause i know its going to hurt her, even though its not intentional, thats just how she is. And it sucks, cause even when she blows it off, or says she doesn't care, i really know that she does, and that it breaks her heart, and that she crys about stuff that i somehow caused. I hate being in that position. If i could be with her dammit, i would be. But i can't, i'm half the country away, and i can't do anything about it at the moment. Its so frustrating. I hate being alone, i hate not being able to see her, but i can't help that. People are really temptations i guess, there are crushes, people you like, crushes happen all the time, but you can't really give into a crush, cause generally nothing ever comes of a crush, it simply comes and goes, right? I feel like i'm rambling, actually i know i am. I just want people to understand. Ok i'll try it this way: say I have a crush on someone, and i think something could possibly work out with that person. But i'm too scared to say something to them, one-because they might not like me, two-i might hurt someone else that i really care about. But i don't want to miss out on an opportunity. So then i'm stuck in the middle, to where i can't decide what to do. I hope that made sense.
Ughh... i hate this, cause i want to post this, but i'm afraid its going to upset Sara. Dammit. I'm so frustrated with this. I want her to understand, that i'm not trying to hurt her, that i love her, and that i could spend the rest of my life with her. But I still have the rest of my life to come. But what about today, and this moment and the next moment. Am I just supposed to sit on the bench and watch the rest of the players play. I don't want to miss out on any opportunities at this point in my life. Maybe at a later moment in my life, I can put all of myself into being with her, but of course she'd have to be physically present to do that. I mean the next moment could be this summer and then i'd be without her at college, then maybe the next moment in the summer or holidays. I mean, there will be moments with and without her until she and I get done with college, unless she moves down here or something, so when shes not with me am i just expected to stop living until the next time i see her? I mean I don't want her to be miserable and all that while shes up in Washington, and it would bother me at all if she dated someone else, or whatever. But when i tell her that, she seems to resist it, and refuse it. But at the same time shes torturing herself. I hate it so much. And alot of the time she acts as if i hate her, which i don't, i'm just caught up in my world down here, and i try to make time for her i really do, but its hard. I mean it would be a million times more easier if she was here. But the fact is, that shes not here, and i'm not there. And theres nothing we can do about that.
But ok back to my point. While i'm not with her, I don't want to miss out on an opportunity to date someone or whatever, cause i don't want to be left wondering what could have happened. I've told Sara that my heart belongs to her, no one can take her place. Another person could only temporarily fill the void that is missing when shes not around. I want to be open with her about all of this, but I don't want her to be upset. But I can't hold it from her, its how i feel, and she deserves to know. So i guess i will actually publish this post now. Hope some of this actually made some sense. Laters.
**An email I was trying to send to Rebecca, but can't cause her email account is full, so i'm putting it on here so maybe she'll see it**
So next weekend right? We're going to hang out? Where do you play friday? I play at home at 7:00. But i'm sure you have an out of town game, but either way, we wouldn't have much time to hang out then. I was thinking about getting alot of the JV girls and getting them to go bowling after my game. I like the JV kids. But as for the rest of the weekend i'm completely free. So i guess just let me know, ok? Ok and now for other stuff....
Ok you'll probably find this funny, cause i do. In your last blogger entry, you talked about too many ex-girlfriends. Well i have to identify with that now, but it has to do with your ex-gfs. Guess who i saw yesterday at the JV tournament. Becky, sophomore i think. She transferred to Midway. She apparently played club with some of the granbury girls, so she was hanging out with them. And i was like man she looks familiar, and then one of the parents that she was talking to her said her name, and then she went somewhere, and i was like did she transfer from Joshua, and they said yeah. And then later on, we got to talking, she asked who i was, and i told her i knew who she was, and she gave me the greatest facial expression ever, it was hilarious. But i told her that I knew you. And then we just talked about some other stuff. She was pretty cool. And then well earlier today, i was bored so i got on planetout, and noticed you'd updated your profile. And on one of the searches i'd had, i saw someone new, so i clicked on them. Then i saw a AIM name that i recoginized, then remembered who it was. I sent her an email, just to say hi, and that i was glad to finally know a little more about her. Well, i guess the looked at my profile and got my AIM name, cause a little while ago she IMed me. And we talked for a bit, Mayra is pretty cool too. Hope you don't think i was butting into anything. You meet alot of cool people. Anyways... i just thought i'd share my interesting meetings. But its funny, but also i find it really cool, cause if i was the way i was back in GR, i never would have said anything to either of them. I'm so much more social these days. New people are cool.
Ok anyways, so i'm going to stop wasting your time. But let me know if you still want to hang out this weekend. Have a good week. Laters. ----------Erin
No i'm not saying i've given into it. But temptation is everywhere. I hate it so much. I love Sara with all of my heart, but shes half the country away. I want to stay true to her, i truly believe i could spend the rest of my life with her. But all i can do right now is talk to her on the phone, i can't hold her or kiss her or any of that. And just to be honest i'm a very intimate person. I like to hold hands, kiss, hold the person, and all that stuff. And to have it once and not have it again, well it drives me crazy. I told her i didn't want to date anyone else but her, which is true, but dammit i'm so lonely down here in Texas. I need someone to keep me company. But see i have a self-resistance from giving into these temptations. Plus well you can't give into tempation when you don't even have the opportunity to. What is it that people say, you can look but you can't touch. The people I would like to atleast go on date with, most likely wouldn't even give me the light of day, nothing more than friends.
I feel like i'm stuck in the middle. Its so frustrating. I do i feel like i'm betraying Sara by thinking all of this or feeling it. Cause i know its going to hurt her, even though its not intentional, thats just how she is. And it sucks, cause even when she blows it off, or says she doesn't care, i really know that she does, and that it breaks her heart, and that she crys about stuff that i somehow caused. I hate being in that position. If i could be with her dammit, i would be. But i can't, i'm half the country away, and i can't do anything about it at the moment. Its so frustrating. I hate being alone, i hate not being able to see her, but i can't help that. People are really temptations i guess, there are crushes, people you like, crushes happen all the time, but you can't really give into a crush, cause generally nothing ever comes of a crush, it simply comes and goes, right? I feel like i'm rambling, actually i know i am. I just want people to understand. Ok i'll try it this way: say I have a crush on someone, and i think something could possibly work out with that person. But i'm too scared to say something to them, one-because they might not like me, two-i might hurt someone else that i really care about. But i don't want to miss out on an opportunity. So then i'm stuck in the middle, to where i can't decide what to do. I hope that made sense.
Ughh... i hate this, cause i want to post this, but i'm afraid its going to upset Sara. Dammit. I'm so frustrated with this. I want her to understand, that i'm not trying to hurt her, that i love her, and that i could spend the rest of my life with her. But I still have the rest of my life to come. But what about today, and this moment and the next moment. Am I just supposed to sit on the bench and watch the rest of the players play. I don't want to miss out on any opportunities at this point in my life. Maybe at a later moment in my life, I can put all of myself into being with her, but of course she'd have to be physically present to do that. I mean the next moment could be this summer and then i'd be without her at college, then maybe the next moment in the summer or holidays. I mean, there will be moments with and without her until she and I get done with college, unless she moves down here or something, so when shes not with me am i just expected to stop living until the next time i see her? I mean I don't want her to be miserable and all that while shes up in Washington, and it would bother me at all if she dated someone else, or whatever. But when i tell her that, she seems to resist it, and refuse it. But at the same time shes torturing herself. I hate it so much. And alot of the time she acts as if i hate her, which i don't, i'm just caught up in my world down here, and i try to make time for her i really do, but its hard. I mean it would be a million times more easier if she was here. But the fact is, that shes not here, and i'm not there. And theres nothing we can do about that.
But ok back to my point. While i'm not with her, I don't want to miss out on an opportunity to date someone or whatever, cause i don't want to be left wondering what could have happened. I've told Sara that my heart belongs to her, no one can take her place. Another person could only temporarily fill the void that is missing when shes not around. I want to be open with her about all of this, but I don't want her to be upset. But I can't hold it from her, its how i feel, and she deserves to know. So i guess i will actually publish this post now. Hope some of this actually made some sense. Laters.
**An email I was trying to send to Rebecca, but can't cause her email account is full, so i'm putting it on here so maybe she'll see it**
So next weekend right? We're going to hang out? Where do you play friday? I play at home at 7:00. But i'm sure you have an out of town game, but either way, we wouldn't have much time to hang out then. I was thinking about getting alot of the JV girls and getting them to go bowling after my game. I like the JV kids. But as for the rest of the weekend i'm completely free. So i guess just let me know, ok? Ok and now for other stuff....
Ok you'll probably find this funny, cause i do. In your last blogger entry, you talked about too many ex-girlfriends. Well i have to identify with that now, but it has to do with your ex-gfs. Guess who i saw yesterday at the JV tournament. Becky, sophomore i think. She transferred to Midway. She apparently played club with some of the granbury girls, so she was hanging out with them. And i was like man she looks familiar, and then one of the parents that she was talking to her said her name, and then she went somewhere, and i was like did she transfer from Joshua, and they said yeah. And then later on, we got to talking, she asked who i was, and i told her i knew who she was, and she gave me the greatest facial expression ever, it was hilarious. But i told her that I knew you. And then we just talked about some other stuff. She was pretty cool. And then well earlier today, i was bored so i got on planetout, and noticed you'd updated your profile. And on one of the searches i'd had, i saw someone new, so i clicked on them. Then i saw a AIM name that i recoginized, then remembered who it was. I sent her an email, just to say hi, and that i was glad to finally know a little more about her. Well, i guess the looked at my profile and got my AIM name, cause a little while ago she IMed me. And we talked for a bit, Mayra is pretty cool too. Hope you don't think i was butting into anything. You meet alot of cool people. Anyways... i just thought i'd share my interesting meetings. But its funny, but also i find it really cool, cause if i was the way i was back in GR, i never would have said anything to either of them. I'm so much more social these days. New people are cool.
Ok anyways, so i'm going to stop wasting your time. But let me know if you still want to hang out this weekend. Have a good week. Laters. ----------Erin
Sunday, January 18, 2004
MAROON 5:
"Sunday Morning"
Sunday morning rain is falling
Steal some covers share some skin
Clouds are shrouding us in moments unforgettable
You twist to fit the mold that I am in
But things just get so crazy living life gets hard to do
And I would gladly hit the road get up and go if I knew
That someday it would lead me back to you
That someday it would lead me back to you
That may be all I need
In darkness she is all I see
Come and rest your bones with me
Driving slow on Sunday morning
And I never want to leave
Fingers trace your every outline
Paint a picture with my hands
Back and forth we sway like branches in a storm
Change the weather still together when it ends
That may be all I need
In darkness she is all I see
Come and rest your bones with me
Driving slow on Sunday morning
And I never want to leave
But things just get so crazy living life gets hard to do
Sunday morning rain is falling and I'm calling out to you
Singing someday it'll bring me back to you
Find a way to bring myself home to you
And you may not know
That may be all I need
In darkness she is all I see
Come and rest your bones with me
Driving slow?
"Sunday Morning"
Sunday morning rain is falling
Steal some covers share some skin
Clouds are shrouding us in moments unforgettable
You twist to fit the mold that I am in
But things just get so crazy living life gets hard to do
And I would gladly hit the road get up and go if I knew
That someday it would lead me back to you
That someday it would lead me back to you
That may be all I need
In darkness she is all I see
Come and rest your bones with me
Driving slow on Sunday morning
And I never want to leave
Fingers trace your every outline
Paint a picture with my hands
Back and forth we sway like branches in a storm
Change the weather still together when it ends
That may be all I need
In darkness she is all I see
Come and rest your bones with me
Driving slow on Sunday morning
And I never want to leave
But things just get so crazy living life gets hard to do
Sunday morning rain is falling and I'm calling out to you
Singing someday it'll bring me back to you
Find a way to bring myself home to you
And you may not know
That may be all I need
In darkness she is all I see
Come and rest your bones with me
Driving slow?
A GAME-BOY. Youre like a tomboy without the love of
sports. Reality sucks, but as long as you have
your electronics you feel you can cope. Time
goes unnoticed when youre locked in your room
hooked up to your Nintendo, rocking to your
favourite collection of guitar-driven albums.
Your virtues: Intelligence, sense-of-humour,
individuality.
Your flaws: Inability to cope with real life,
action-freak spirit, reclusive nature.
What kind of girl are you?
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You, my friend are a true individual. You most
likely hate trends and are creative. By seeing
things differently, people either admire you or
think you are a bit strange. An inspiration to us all,
continue being you!
A Deeper Look Inside Yourself (with pics)
brought to you by Quizilla
you're charlie. you have a very artistic soul and a
high sense of morals, which is a good thing.
you're really shy because you think it's better
that way, but people could actually gain a lot
from your wisdom. speak up more! when something
bad happens, you kind of beat yourself up about
things, but cheer up, and know that you and
only you control your life.
Which the Perks of Being a Wallflower Character Are You?
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Ghost or spirit: You are a lost soul. Very calm and
sweet, you are often the one who asks: What if?
With a clever mind, you want to explore the
world on a different level. Without the
answers, you aren't ready to move on. You are
most likely very creative and find yourself
thinking things through on a different level.
(please rate my quiz)
**Where will you go when you die?**(now with pics)
brought to you by Quizilla
Rain: You are the sound of rain. You have two
important sides. There is your strong, powerful
side and your calm, gentle side. Both are very
important. Rain also reflects a bit of darkness
in your personality. It isn't bad, just shows
that along with the good, you also can see bad,
which can come in handy. (please rate my quiz)
What Sound Are You?(now w/ pics)
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Cinderella!
What movie Do you Belong in?(many different outcomes!)
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Of all things, Cinderella?? out of 17 other movies, lol!!
My inner child is ten years old!
The adult world is pretty irrelevant to me. Whether
I'm off on my bicycle (or pony) exploring, lost
in a good book, or giggling with my best
friend, I live in a world apart, one full of
adventure and wonder and other stuff adults
don't understand.
How Old is Your Inner Child?
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Saturday, January 17, 2004
Sunday, January 11, 2004
**Its Been awhile since I've really written**
Everything lately seems so surreal. Well not completely I guess, its just that lately everything seems to blur together, like I can't seperate from one moment to the next. Maybe it just seems that way cause I haven't written in so long. Cause I've been trying to remember everything, and generally when I do that it seems as if my mind gets crowded and its hard for me to decide which memory is which, does that make sense?
Here lately, I haven't been able to stop thinking about the people in my life, and how my relationships with them are. I've grown apart from so many people that i love in the last year and a half, or well more than that with some people. My senior friends when i was a freshman, Diana and Lisa, I haven't talked to them in atleast 2 1/2 years. Then of course theres Michelle, the one i first fell in love with, and ultimately ruined our friendship and the real reason i came to Granbury, everything with her has been fucked up since my sophomore year, I miss her, but I haven't really talked to her in the las year or so. Ok and Dana, such an awesome girl, shes off at Tech, so i don't see her, haven't really talked to her in the last 2 years either. And well theres Rebecca, our relationship has well seemingly gone downhill through out the last year or so, we see each other oh maybe 3 times a year, hardly talk at all (we tend to blame it on the fact that shes always busy, which is true, but on my side of it, i guess you could say i'm intimidated or afraid of doing something wrong around her, i've always felt the need to try and be perfect around her, but its always impossible cause i'm definately not perfect). Oh wow, I almost forgot Meghann, one of my best friends, I've hardly talked to her since she started dating Scott, which was well like 2 years ago i guess, then i transferred schools so that made it even harder, shes gotten married (which i was a bridesmaid) and had a baby girl, but we've just gone our own ways i guess, i miss her, she was always there for me no matter what, she has never judged me with anything that i've done, and I apreciate her so much for it, she got me through alot of rough times.
I've always been curious of why people grow apart. I know we're all on our seperate paths in life, but none of us have seemed to manage to stay close. Is it perhaps that we each have a certain moments in each others lives, and leave some sort of impact and then its time to move on. I've heard it somewhere, some friend email, says something like, even if we grow apart i wanted you to know that you've left footprints (or imprints) on my heart. Is everything just a cause and effect type of thing. Or does anything really last forever. See growing apart is hard for me, I grow attached to people, and its often hard to let go, mentally atleast. Generally I don't notice for awhile that I've grown apart from someone, until its too late, and then it continues to bother me, the fact that they're not a part of my life.
I swear I'm ADD, I can not concentrate on anything, at all. I always zone out and think about a million different things, its starting to really bother me. Especially when i'm thinking of something important, i randomly space out and starting thinking about something like crayons. Oh another thing that keeps bothering me, is I used to know all sorts of things, mainly pointless facts to some people, but I knew about everything, and knew everything i was talking about, and i used it in conversations all the time. And now i don't remember it, even the simple stuff, an example for you, is I couldn't remember what the Super Bowl was called, i really couldn't remember it, I was like the main NFL championship thing. Its really sad, and it frustrates me so much, cause i've forgotten everything that i used to know. Perhaps its because i have so many new memories that I've repressed everthing to the back of my mind, or maybe its the fact that I haven't had any real classes in the last year 1/2 so I haven't had to really use my knowledge for anything. But the fact still remains that i forget half the stuff I talk about. Its really annoying.
So yeah basically the point of that last paragraph was to say, that I've forgotten was i was going to write, and I keep spacing out every time i try to write, so I'm just going to go for now, and try to write again later. Alright, have a good day. Laters
Everything lately seems so surreal. Well not completely I guess, its just that lately everything seems to blur together, like I can't seperate from one moment to the next. Maybe it just seems that way cause I haven't written in so long. Cause I've been trying to remember everything, and generally when I do that it seems as if my mind gets crowded and its hard for me to decide which memory is which, does that make sense?
Here lately, I haven't been able to stop thinking about the people in my life, and how my relationships with them are. I've grown apart from so many people that i love in the last year and a half, or well more than that with some people. My senior friends when i was a freshman, Diana and Lisa, I haven't talked to them in atleast 2 1/2 years. Then of course theres Michelle, the one i first fell in love with, and ultimately ruined our friendship and the real reason i came to Granbury, everything with her has been fucked up since my sophomore year, I miss her, but I haven't really talked to her in the las year or so. Ok and Dana, such an awesome girl, shes off at Tech, so i don't see her, haven't really talked to her in the last 2 years either. And well theres Rebecca, our relationship has well seemingly gone downhill through out the last year or so, we see each other oh maybe 3 times a year, hardly talk at all (we tend to blame it on the fact that shes always busy, which is true, but on my side of it, i guess you could say i'm intimidated or afraid of doing something wrong around her, i've always felt the need to try and be perfect around her, but its always impossible cause i'm definately not perfect). Oh wow, I almost forgot Meghann, one of my best friends, I've hardly talked to her since she started dating Scott, which was well like 2 years ago i guess, then i transferred schools so that made it even harder, shes gotten married (which i was a bridesmaid) and had a baby girl, but we've just gone our own ways i guess, i miss her, she was always there for me no matter what, she has never judged me with anything that i've done, and I apreciate her so much for it, she got me through alot of rough times.
I've always been curious of why people grow apart. I know we're all on our seperate paths in life, but none of us have seemed to manage to stay close. Is it perhaps that we each have a certain moments in each others lives, and leave some sort of impact and then its time to move on. I've heard it somewhere, some friend email, says something like, even if we grow apart i wanted you to know that you've left footprints (or imprints) on my heart. Is everything just a cause and effect type of thing. Or does anything really last forever. See growing apart is hard for me, I grow attached to people, and its often hard to let go, mentally atleast. Generally I don't notice for awhile that I've grown apart from someone, until its too late, and then it continues to bother me, the fact that they're not a part of my life.
I swear I'm ADD, I can not concentrate on anything, at all. I always zone out and think about a million different things, its starting to really bother me. Especially when i'm thinking of something important, i randomly space out and starting thinking about something like crayons. Oh another thing that keeps bothering me, is I used to know all sorts of things, mainly pointless facts to some people, but I knew about everything, and knew everything i was talking about, and i used it in conversations all the time. And now i don't remember it, even the simple stuff, an example for you, is I couldn't remember what the Super Bowl was called, i really couldn't remember it, I was like the main NFL championship thing. Its really sad, and it frustrates me so much, cause i've forgotten everything that i used to know. Perhaps its because i have so many new memories that I've repressed everthing to the back of my mind, or maybe its the fact that I haven't had any real classes in the last year 1/2 so I haven't had to really use my knowledge for anything. But the fact still remains that i forget half the stuff I talk about. Its really annoying.
So yeah basically the point of that last paragraph was to say, that I've forgotten was i was going to write, and I keep spacing out every time i try to write, so I'm just going to go for now, and try to write again later. Alright, have a good day. Laters
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