**Letter to Kear**

Lol so what was that email about, I know how you feel, believe me. It really sucks to disconnect from people. I don't have an excuse for not emailing you or whatever. I've been trying to get my life back together. The last few months have been hell for me, everything went downhill. Yeah I failed english, but i got lucky i guess, i only missed one game, which was the most important game (when we played abilene), but i don't care. I gave someone else a great chance, to fill my position. The girl's name is Stephanie, she was so unbeliveably nervous, but i found it funny. I got to coach and train her, which i really enjoyed. I've really got a lot of options of careers when i get older. Once I stop traveling the world, i can either be a coach or a counselor, or hell maybe both, lol. I've got college and my major and all that worked out. But the coach at the school, never showed up to any of the games. So i guess I'm going to have to call him and see if he wants me to come practice with them (since they're NAIA, i can legally do that), or if he just wants me to make a highlight video. Its quite frustrating, i really want to play there, i know i can play there, easily. Audrie has been telling me she thinks she might just go there just so she could play soccer. Which its only a business school and she wants to major in education and to be a coach, but she said if she could play soccer, she'd just major in business management or something like that. But i don't know, shes Audrie, her life is pretty crazy at the moment too.

Well I was lucky i only missed one game, for some reason there is a rule that on holidays every student is eligible. So friday i got to play, granted it was against Mineral Wells, but i was able to be a part of senior night. For a good 20 minutes every senior was on the field, well except goalie, which was Heather. But Kim, Sarah and Nikki and everyone else was out there. Nikki and Sarah scored, i was really happy for them. We won 11-0. And although you know, Stephenville lost. And I'm sure he told you about the coach. Wink and I have gotten fairly close over the last 2 months. He talked to me last week about the coach. We both agreed that he would want his team to lose on purpose just so we wouldnt make playoffs. But Gina talked to some of their girls, and he indeed did ask them to lose, but they went against him, but still lost. I knew in my heart all year, that we wouldn't make playoffs. We always played, some with heart, others without heart. I play with heart, but unfortunately, i'm the blessed one to be the realist of the group. There are alot of factors to a team, and you as a coach know that. In order to win, all of these factors have to come together. Well we didn't always have all of those factors. But i never dared to tell the team that after we lost, or else they would have killed me. But really I screamed my head off the entire game, every game, even the game i didn't play in (and all the parents thought i was a terets kid (can't spell sorry) it was amusing). I always trie to me encouraging and tried to point out things to everyone else of what they needed to do, you know like pass then or you need to be back post, etc. Which it took all year to learn back post, and only one peron learned, and they still weren't consistent. That was our main problem all year, we had so many opportunities to score, but no one was ever back post to receive the through ball. I can't ever explain how frustrating it is being a defender and seing the same mistakes over and over again. Do i make mistakes, HELL YEAH. Do I dwell on them, no. I just keep playing my game. But well i believe everyone hated me by the end of the season, cause i would tell them the truth, and they didn't necessarily like to hear it. If they would have came to me and pointed out to me something i needed to do, I would have been more than glad to hear it, but they never did that. Was there every anything they could have told me? I have no idea, but if there was, they were too afraid to say it.

As far as playoffs go, i'm not disappointed. We had a good finish. And alot of the girls got to go on vacations, that they really needed. And here i am, bored out of my mind, i have nothing to do. I'd like to go kick the ball around, but almost everyone is out of town or they're busy. I know Tyler Spirlock would go with me, but I'm still pretty shy around the guys. But him and I are pretty cool, its surprising actually, hes in my english class this tri. And I'm sure Bree would love to go, but she just had surgery so, well all she'll be doing it staying in the house. I called her the other day, but she was asleep from the meds, and i told her mom to call me, and i still haven't received a call, i emailed her a few days before too, and told her to call me. But still nothing.

I haven't nothing to do this week. Well I need to do defensive driving over the internet, but thats boring, and i don't want to do it, but i have to, so i don't have to pay a ticket. Cause i don't want to ruin my moms insurance. I bought some paint, brushes, and a few stencils and walmart to day. I'm going to decorate my shower. :) when you decorate your shower, is how you truly know that your bored out of your mind.

Hmmmm...... well i guess I don't really have much else to say, so I guess I will go. Hope you enjoy my fairly long email. Longer than most of everyone else's emails, right? lol I tend to write alot, but i know this isn't as long as some of my other emails to you. But well I shall go now, goodluck at playoffs, perhaps i'll come and watch this week. I'll talk to you later Coach.

love always,

Erin Jones